Everything is Simple

Anthropomorphism: The Dog Downstairs

I hear you. I know it’s you. You’re the only one who slams your door that way. You don’t even know what’s coming your way. I’m going to bite your ass so hard with my canine teeth.

I pay no mind to the hot blonde, sitting on the couch watching The Real Housewives of Orange County, as I stampede past her toward your sorry ass. Once I find my way through these big blinds, you’re mine. I’m eating you for dinner.

Fuck. You’re right there. Why did that bitch leave the sliding glass door closed?

Anyway, I’m going to keep screaming at you until you’re out of sight. Just so you know. Just so you know that I am always here, always ready to fuck your shit up.

Yeah, you better walk away. Mmm hmm. Let me go get some water.

Oh shit! Here comes someone else!